When life isn’t glorious…

I’m sitting here at 4am, unable to sleep (though I need it), and overwhelmed by a mountain of To-Dos.

But maybe “overwhelmed” isn’t the word, because what’s going through me isn’t so much feelings about everything that’s not getting done. It’s more a quiet realization that my life is not balanced as it should be. One area of my life is shoving everything else out, and I (and my family) will pay in the long run if I continue as I have been recently. 

It’s not that I can’t go on like I have been. I could easily do it for quite a long time.

It’s that I must not.

But how to change it?  That’s where I’m lost.   

There are two areas of the Bible that I keep getting drawn to recently. One is Romans… it’s time to get back to the Bible Study I began last year.  The other is Psalm 119.

Psalm 119 has a section for every letter of the Hebrew alphabet, and each section is only eight verses long. I’ve been reading section every morning or two, and it’s amazing how often what I read is perfect for that day.  Each is a slightly different declaration from a heart hungry for the law, the word, and the ways of the Lord.

In this Psalm, the law that the Psalmist loves isn’t exactly the laws of Moses. As Romans said, that law was an earthly thing that was fulfilled in Jesus.

It’s talking about the laws of God…the eternal absolutes that God laid the foundations of the world upon. God’s ways.

The truth is that even a world that doesn’t recognize Him still functions according to what He set in motion.

The billions of people who don’t acknowledge Him still live on a planet that spins and changes seasons according to the orbit He fore-ordained.

Even when I ignore Him, I still reap what I sow because He wove that law into the fabric of existence.

Thus, it only makes sense that more I know His laws, the more I can align my life with what works.
And the more my life is lined up with His ways, the better my life will be.

And so I find myself with no better plan than to lay my life down at His feet and ask Him to shine His light on it…ask Him to show me where my life is out of line and grant me the grace to cut out what does not belong.

Father, I beg for that grace. I ask for wisdom and courage to do what You show me. For I trust Your ways better than my own, and I long to see Your ways bear fruit in my life.

33 Teach me, O Lord, the way of Your statutes,
And I shall observe it to the end.
34 Give me understanding, that I may observe Your law
And keep it with all my heart.
35 Make me walk in the path of Your commandments,
For I delight in it.
36 Incline my heart to Your testimonies
And not to dishonest gain.
37 Turn away my eyes from looking at vanity,
And revive me in Your ways.
38 Establish Your word to Your servant,
As that which produces reverence for You.
39 Turn away my reproach which I dread,
For Your ordinances are good.
40 Behold, I long for Your precepts;
Revive me through Your righteousness.

– from Psalm 119

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